Ride of Your Life

Do you ever realize you are currently on an emotional roller-coaster but you can’t remember when and where you bought the ride token?  When you look around your seat all you see is chaos and negativity but last time you checked everything was going fine.  Were you deceiving yourself?

After my mom passed away in September 2010, my whole life changed.  I went from being semi-positive person to trying my best to “not sweat the small stuff” kind of person.  My mother drilled that into our heads as children when her life took a dramatic turn after a MS diagnosis. She never once asked God why He chose her to carry this burden but instead she decided that she would live with a “peace that passes all understanding”.  (If you know me that’s where the “peace” and date came from on my lower tattoo sleeve)

Now with that being said you can see how such a person would change the lives of others.  Everyone remembers her as the positive role model she was.  She changed so many lives and when I sat by her side as she passed away at the very young age of 52, she changed mine as well.  Suddenly all that was wrong in my life, my marriage, my parenting skills, and even some of my thoughts had disappeared.  It was no longer worth dwelling on the negative and I started to search out the positive.

“Rachel you are too stressed out to be so young baby.  Don’t sweat the small stuff, and guess what babygirl………it’s ALL small stuff!”  - My mother’s words ring in my ears daily – “It will work out, just be patient and know.”

Last night as I tossed and turned for the sixth night in a row, I realized that I have been on this negative spiral and I have allowed someone else put me there.  All I see is mess in my home, children disobeying, and the possible money troubles that may be fast approaching through the furlough period.  IT STOPS NOW!!!  No longer will I allow someone else to steal my joy!  No longer will I focus on what others may think of our life/parenting skills.  No longer will my choices, style of living, or business decision be of anyone else’s concern outside of my home. 

I love the life that my husband and I have built together.  It was a VERY rough path to get here, one that if it weren’t for my mother holding my hand I may not have made, but at this point in the road I am glad we are here.  I am PROUD of my children and the men they are becoming.  I am PROUD of their accomplishments no matter how small they may seem to others. And I am PROUD to say I am their mother, step-mother, teacher, example, and overall life coach.

TODAY it changes!!  I am getting off this stupid roller-coaster!  Why??............Why not?

Life is too short to do anything but enjoy it!

Where have you been?

Ok so I started this whole blog thing as a way to “journal” my life in order to help others that may be faced with similar issues.  However, after starting this it seemed to just fall to the waist side (like many other things lately), but I am trying hard to recommit to.  A wonderful friend of mine, yes Stacey that would be you, fusses at me EVERY time I chat with her that I haven’t blogged lol.

Here we go,

Our first official year of homeschooling is OVER!!  It is bittersweet.  We had a blast doing arts and crafts (note to self, 13 year olds do not appreciate that as much as 6 and 4 year olds do), we planned school around family time together, and even made it on a few “field trips”.

What was our outcome?  I’m so glad you asked! Ha - We found out that we have AMAZINGLY smart children that just weren’t given their moment to shine in the public school system.  Malachi zoomed through the kindergarten curriculum in no time flat and is very ready to start 1^st grade.  Jeremy caught up on the 7^th grade things he missed in the public school and flew pretty well through 8^th grade.

We learned that a more advanced curriculum is needed for next year, one with a little more in-depth thinking.  I learned not to let planning over whelm me and to do it ahead of time.  Grades really don’t matter that much, and work doesn’t always have to be perfect.  Sometimes it is totally ok to put down the books and get to the root of the child’s problem because it may not really be that math problem that is the issue.

Above all else, we learned that we can TOTALLY educate our children!  We can raise them to highly functioning members of society and we can do it well!  In just our first year we have managed to tame the disrespectful little punks, and start turning them into gentlemen.  Ok well maybe not totally gentlemen yet, but they are well on their way.  It is amazing what you can do with you remove the negative influences.

Micah has flourished from a non-vocal 3 year old to a never quite jabbering 4 year old.  He can now hold a small conversation with you and is even beginning to follow directions.  He may still be severely delayed but man has he made progress.

Above all else, we are a happy family!  I no longer allow nah-sayers in our life to be vocal.  I can’t stop you from thinking I can’t do it, but you are not allowed to vocalize it to me and expect to continue our conversation.  This is our life and our journey, and we are PROUD of it.

So why did I fall of the blog planet……..why not? – I had a family to encourage.

Loving My New Job

So last night I had a thought while sorting through inventory, I am no longer “hiding” my job.  I kept it under wraps for a while because of what some of my family members and uptight friends might think but then I thought……..who cares!  God knows what I do, my mom looking down on me knows what I do, AND on top of those two – I LOVE my job!! (and the money isn’t bad either lol) ;0)

Here it goes……….

Back in January I became a Pure Romance Consultant.  (And see you thought it was going to be bad lol)  I love being in direct sales (the kids still think moma sells candles haha) and I have finally found my niche.  I love helping women discover that they in fact are NOT broken and many of us have some of the same problems.  I love the fact that I can help change a relationship from boring to exciting.  I LOVE the fact that a customer told me that I saved her marriage by helping her bring intimacy back their lives.  Yes we do sell “toys” but we call them bedroom accessories and much to my surprise that is only about 15% of my sells.  As a matter of fact I really don’t even focus on them much.  It’s the products like Body Dew, Sensations, Dust me pink, whipped, and x-Scream that I focus on the most.  The things that spice it up a little and really help us women to clear our minds and focus on our men! 

Lack of intimacy is in the top 5 reasons of divorce these days (it, among other things, killed my first marriage [and my husband’s]). It is essential that we as women can clear our minds of the day’s disappointments and focus on our spouse or significant other and regain the pre-life/pre-kids relationship we once had.  After all in 18 years they are gone, THAT is NOT the time to turn to your spouse and say “ok NOW it’s your turn.”  Keep them first!!!  After the kids go to bed or the day settles down, Have FUN!!!  THAT is what my job is about! 

I like to keep my shows around PG-13 depending on the crowd. Trashy just isn’t really my thing, you know.  Classy and educational is more my style.  I take pride in the fact that clients tell me that I made them feel comfortable and enlightened.  I love the fact that they feel like they can talk with me about very important relationship issues in the privacy of the ordering room.  I love that I can help fix a problem that they thought was just unfixable.  Isn’t that what life is really all about?…….girl talk lol

Any questions?

I will go ahead and answer the number 1 question that will be in a few of your minds……..no my kids do not see anything.  Everything is left behind closed and LOCKED doors inside locked cases.  Moma goes to work on some nights and still takes a candle bag with her lol.  As they get older they may start to get curious but as of now there doesn’t seem to be an issue.  My 12 year old bonus doesn’t let on that he knows and he doesn’t have access to it even if he did.

Why “come out” about this now?.............Why not!

WHOOO HOOOOO!!!!!!!!

WOW what a crazy life we lead!!!  Tons have happened in the Kovach house, just yesterday actually.  After many of trips back and forth to the Marcus institute in Atlanta we have finally gotten Micah’s results from the long and drawn out Autism screening.  I never that a negative would be so good to hear.  My little munchkin does NOT have Autism.  He is delayed in a few areas such as speech and cognitive skills but it will be overcome.  Mind you that I would have been just as “ok” with the diagnosis or “labeling” of Autism.  I was so ready for the positive that the negative was a HUGE surprise.  I went there to find where on the spectrum he fell.  I wish I could have seen the look on my own face when she said “I have good news for you today!”

Now on to speech classes and intense treatment.  We have about a year and a half to catch up on.  He is starting to speak finally.  Three months ago he said Moma and Daddy for the first “real” time.  So now he is really speaking at a 12-18 month old level. (he’s 3 years old)  He has obviously been listening when I teach Malachi things so we are just going to teach both at the same time.  I think I will have Malachi “help” me teach him to talk.  First thing first, get Malachi to stop talking for him! Lol

I will no longer hinder my son by relying on the phrase “That’s just part of it.” Like his therapist in the past has done.    BIG changes coming soon!

Why push your children to do better and go further than they think they can?..........Why not?!?!!?  I think if you never set the bar, there’s never anything to reach for.

WOW!!! It has been a hectic life in the Kovach house lately!!!  We have continued with the kitchen remodel, little by little as the money comes in.  (The Christmas decorations are still out!)  And the kids are now back to school!

Micah, my little man, started a special education pre-k program at the local school here and needless to say…….Moma hates it!!!  My baby has just turned 3!  I am suppose to have him home with me for a little while longer, right?!?!?

Isn't he just the cutest!!!!

You would think I would enjoy the peace and quiet around the house but it only happens for 2 hours each day and I just don’t know what to do with myself.  So this week I am sewing…….pajama pants and school pants for the little ones, dress pants for me (hopefully I can make the pattern), blankets for the older boys (hubby and Jeremy), and maybe a shirt in there somewhere if I get brave enough.

So no time to continue writing today……..I have a lot of work to do!!!  I just didn’t want you guys to think I feel off the side of the world!! lol

Crazy time!!!

WOW, WOW, WOW…………….Glad that is done!!  Was Christmas crazy at your house too?

I guess it was kind of my fault.  I was finishing up jammies on Christmas Eve day and managed hats to match that I also finished last minute.  Some may think that’s not so bad but we open our new jammies after dinner so that they can sleep in them and wear them all day on Christmas.  (It’s a tradition my mother started when I was a kid.)  The hats were new though………..they were just fun and I couldn’t pass them up. 

I found the idea on Pintrest (yes, I am VERY addicted, thanks Stef!! lol) Just click here and you can make you one as well.  I did change a few things but never the less, the tutorial is great!

We have a divided house when it comes to sports team and the picture really does show that….

There's never a good picture of everyone taken in this house!

                                      

Now that Christmas is done, most people normally take a few days off before New Year right?  Oh no, not here.  For some reason I decided that we needed to start right away on the kitchen remodel.  Demolition of kitchen wall took place the day after Christmas!!  What was I thinking?!?!?!?!????  There is dust EVERY WHERE!!!! But I can’t even begin to describe how fun it was! – There is just something about putting a hammer through a wall to make your day better.   Talk about taking out some aggression!  My first couple of hits were on a stud and it didn’t go through.   My hubby just smile but I didn’t care, I just kept swinging!

Now I guess I better get off of here and go put the Christmas décor (after cleaning the dust of first) back into the attic…….

Who am I kidding……..Pintrest here I come!! – Why not?

Our Steven's first visit

I know it is a little late to get started but my Mother in law brought Malachi an Elf on the Shelf when she came up for her Christmas visit yesterday.  Malachi is LOVING him already!!  Works out great for mom because I only have to remember to help “Steven” find a new home each night three times before he returns to Santa.

This morning Malachi found the box he came in and the book that goes along with him.  He said – Moma!! Moma!! Look its just like him!!! – as he points out the window of the front door.

Since we can’t touch him, Malachi just told him (through the door) that he can come in whenever he gets ready.  There is also a small bowl of cereal waiting for him, whenever he decides he’s hungry I guess lol.

I thought it would be next year before we did this but Hey…..Why not this year?  Working out great thus far!